We left home at 9 AM and returned at 6PM. It was a tough day for everyone involved and I am glad it is over. This visit to the Psychiatrist was the initial visit to her and took a lot longer than I had hoped. We doubled Patches and Michael's meds and added Risperdal to Ava. I am happy with her decisions. Patches and Michael showed their butts in the waiting room and in her office so she got to see a minor version of their behaviors. Patches was in shut down mode and refused to look at her or speak, when I tried to touch her arm she flinched and hollered. Michael beat his head against the wall and kicked the floor the entire time only screaming out a few times but mocked me the entire visit with hand motions and nasty faces behind my back. She loved the way I dealt with the kids and told them how lucky they were. HAHAHAHAHA, if she only knew I really wanted to beat their cute little rears at times like this.
This is the 2nd morning in a row I have gotten up with a migraine. I took something and needed to lay back down for a bit with a warm rag. The kids had a better idea and got up, I told them to go watch cartoons for a bit thinking Cyr was still in bed. SHe has hit that lovely age when she can sleep through a tornado, not today though. SHe had somehow gotten past me. Michael and the twins asked to get dressed and I agreed. The part that made me shoot outta bed and run downstairs was when the front door slammed. They decided if they were dressed they could go outside. Not here. I have to supervise b/c they still do not help each other out like they should. They do not feel pain and tend to not ask for help when they really need it but cry like they are dying over a paper cut. It is very strange but the others do not respond appropriately either. It is getting better but an adult must be "around" when they are playing outside, just in case.
Ruthie is really struggling with emotions lately. I think the move is to blame but she is blaming us again for her removal from her parents care and them for any poor choice she makes. No, it doesn't make sense and I am not sure exactly how to help her understand that. We have a rule that applies to any disagreement, you can only be mad at someone here for what they have done that day. You can't blame them for others doings or things they did a long time ago. My kids have a very difficult time staying in the present when they get upset. We are trying to drive this concept home for her but she isn't getting it. Last night she asked to go to bed early and then proceeded to trashing her room and screaming at the kids when they went to bed 15 minutes later. It took her over an hour to get her to stop sobbing. She has no idea what started it but of course she hated us all for making her live here.
Emma is spending 2 nights with her sister, Mother, and Nana. I am so happy for her, she is having a blast. We all miss her here, even the kids commented on her absence.
I think I have discovered Cyr's new plan. She is grooming Emma. I began to notice her spending a bit more time with Emma and then with her sister when she came. I have seen Cyr slowly break or bend rules we have in place just for her and other children. She can not sit touching anyone, can not hold anyone, carry anyone, have anyone on her lap, etc. She is doing all these things like they are accidents. We have 2 kids we trust are strong enough to stand up to Cyr, Patches and Emma. Both have no problem with inappropriate touch or telling her what to do. We never allow them alone with her but they are in charge of her and other children, kind of like a monitor if I use the restroom or am in the next room. If I can not personally view the play, they are to step in and do a very good job of it. What I am seeing now is Cyr is barely breaking a rule and doing it over and over until it is acceptable and then breaking it a bit more. She asked if Emma and her sister could sleep in sleeping bags on her bedroom floor the other night. I laughed and told her, "Nice try". We will have a nice long chat with Emma and Patches when she returns, Cyr will no longer have the privilege of being around multiple any children w/o direct adult supervision. I trust her even less now and that makes me so sad. I am glad to have caught this behavior before it escalated into abuse. I am glad I recognize it for what it is b/c you want so badly to believe they are capable of remorse and healing, she is not. I want her to "out grow" this but I know she won't stop until she starts to make progress in therapy. She has made no effort there at all.