I was nervous and asked if it was inapporpriate to vomit in front of the Judge. I declined to speak in their Mother's sentencing b/c I felt I had said enough. I had spoken to the Probation Investigator and both the prosecuting and defense attorneys to explain our view that she was a victim but had many chances to tell someone. She needed some prison time and we had already worked out her deal. The Judge decided to uphold her plea bargain and she received 20 but has to serve 10.
He was a different story b/c he decided to go to trial and was proven guilty on most charges. He continued to be his arogant self and explained he was innocent. He refused to accept any responsibility for his actions and wanted to retrial it right there by presenting new evidence. At one point, he said he hoped the real guilty person would go to jail. Moron. The defense attorney only wanted to merge a few of the charges to have their sentence run concurrent and to reitterate he stated he was innocent of all charges. The A.D.A. called me up to speak and I read the following with my hands shaking so hard the words were blurry at times. I managed not to cry but it wasn't for lack of emotion.
I want you to imagine having a parent that did the things this man is guilty of. Most people have parents that tuck them into bed at night but he would wake the children from their beds and bring them to his room to satisfy his sexual needs, making nights extremely terrifying for them. He had all the power in the world over our children. He was more powerful than police, DFCS, the school, and even the courts b/c they kept sending them back to him over and over, 5 times. They couldn't trust they were free from him. They were frightened of him for all the things he did and still loved him b/c he was their father. A role he never earned but was awarded. He dominated them and their mother. They view her as another victim in their home. She couldn't save them b/c she was just like them. Three years after coming into
our home they still do not trust that we are different.
Cyr feels her body is damaged beyond repair. She carries a huge burden of guilt b/c she reinacted the same acts he was proven guilty of doing on our children. She is angry. She lost much of her childhood trying to protect her siblings. She wants him to pay for what he done and taken from them. She feels forever is too short.
Patches is so traumatized she has had to be hospitalized in a psychiatric facility. We have been told numerous times to look for a long term placement in a residential treatment facility b/c she struggles so hard to remain our a family. We will continue to fight her b/c she deserves some normalcy after what she endured.
Ruthie wets herself regularly both day and night. She is terrified she will be stolen by them. We have had to go to great lengths to prove she is safe at school b/c of this fear. She is confused b/c she misses them so much but hates what they did to her. She is desperate to stop thinking about all of this.
Michael has been hospitalized b/c he is filled with so much anger he hurts others. After seeing his father here in court, he had to be hospitalized again. His stress caused him to become more aggressive than normal for him
and feared he would hurt me or himself. He sleeps by the side of my bed b/c night time is too scary for him. He thinks about what happened and can't sleep without medication. He has nightmares and cries in his sleep.
Ella, too, sleeps in my room. She talks constantly about what happened and tries to understand why. She wets nightly and cries in her sleep. She and Ruthie are embarrassed and confused by their physical reaction to the abuse. They are dealing with a great deal of shame.
Ava's way of coping is to ignore it all. She has only been able to talk about it a couple of times briefly.
We have made many attempts to find ways to help them feel safe. We have spent 3 years in therapy, read every book we could get our hands on, attended conferences, sought out support groups, and asked many professionals for ways to help them. It boils down to this, they are forever changed by these events. We can help them cope but we can never take these events back. This will impact their future, their spouses, other children they have contact with, and their own children. Virtually, every relationship they have and will have will be affected by their inability to trust b/c of these horrific events and that it was further damaging b/c he was their parent. Nothing has had the impact that their imprisonment has made. They were able to focus on themselves instead of their fear.
The elementary school our children attend had to change their policy to protect them from taking the innocence from another child b/c of their poor boundaries with others. They can't spend the night out, have friends over for an afternoon, dress out in PE, play hide and seek, hang out in their room on the phone, or share a blanket while they watch a movie. We have to closely supervise them, keep door alarms on their doors, have video cameras in their Playroom, and have strict rules regarding undressing for showers. Normal, every day things they have to miss out on b/c they can't be safe or don't feel safe. They take daily medications to help them control their anger, fear, anxiety, depression, and sleep. Their lives are controlled by these emotions and his abuse. They deserve to know he can never get to them again. They deserve to see that his consequence was as severe as their's. He deserves to serve the same life sentence he gave them. He deserves to spend the rest of his life behind bars.
I went back to my seat and waited for the sentence while the A.D.A. explained that other cases have brought about 60-80 years and she felt at least that much would be appropriate. Then the Judge began some legal mumbo jumbo that was very confusing for the rest of us in the courtroom. He announced a Life sentence for the Agg. Sexual Battery. Seems easy enough, right? Then he started saying something about 40 yrs and 60 yrs, and then something about 20 yrs. A minimum time served of 40 yrs and on and on. I had it explained to me 3 different ways before I understood and the tears started rolling. He will never get out. He received a Life sentence with 40 yrs minimum before being considered for parole plus 60 yrs for the CM charges that will be consecutively run plus 20 yrs probation. Still confused? I was. I thought he would get out in 40 yrs. Probably not. He is eligible for parole but then he has these nasty 60 yrs to serve! They said that will muddy the waters and he should never see the light of day w/o his little jumpsuit.
I want to kiss that Judge! He did exactly what needed to be done. He made up for all the other court rulings regarding my children and their safety. These amazing people involved in the entire case saved my children when all others had walked away. This took years of dedication and I am sure they took this home. I am sure they spent nights thinking about how to pull this off, putting aside their own families for my chidlren. We will all forever be thankful for hard work. My children will be safe and more importantly than that, they will feel safe. From the bottom of my heart, thank you Rosemary, Det. Johnson, Det. Bedford, Judge Howell, and last but not least, Jenny.