Monday, July 20, 2009

Michael, Rosa, and Kiera's Mother

Michael is sleeping on my bedroom floor now. He is too scared to sleep in his room or to be alone. Going to the bathroom is almost too much for him to handle. We increased his anti-anxiety meds from PRN to every 4 hours. It seems to be helping a little. He came in awhile ago and told me he was collecting fireflies and needs a jar, it was 4PM and I am confident they aren't out lighting up until dusk. Is this something I correct him about? DO I play along? I am just out of my element with this. Anyway, the meds make him a bit slower so he nearly drowned at the pool today b/c he got tired after he dove into the middle of the deep end. Good thing I was out there already b/c he went under and couldn't keep his head up. Poor little dude, he was embarrassed and acted like he was done swimming for the day. I didn't burst his bubble.

I rarely talk about Rosa anymore. Many things her children do she takes personally. She doesn't want people to know about. I try to respect her privacy and theirs. I can say she is working hard on their issues and has no plans to leave here when school starts. I am fine with that. We lost so much time with her that as far as I am concerned she can stay as long as she needs. I always have room for more. (This also applies to you, you know who you are.) Rosa is still planning on attending the police academy next month. She is a little irritated with her self that she has taken 8 months to get it going. As I told her, she needed the time to be with her kids and recover from a traumatic relationship. She is healing and learning to control her anger towards him fr the good of her kids. I am proud of her.

Kiera's mother may be out on bond today. I am still mad and plan on having a serious discussion about the future of Kiera. I will not allow her to drag this out w/o making ANY changes in her lifestyle. I am not a lifetime babysitter. She is welcome to have a very open adoption with us, like Emma and her Mother. Kiera can't live with so much uncertainty, she needs permanency.

Not much else going on. Patches' IEP is Thursday and I am a wreck about that. I actually feel sorry for them. Between Miss C and this rabid Mama, they don't stand a chance. LOL Don't even think about messing with my babies.


Laura said...

I struggle like Rosa does. I take so much of my kids' behavior personally and that's why I get so frustrated! I've been learning so much thru you as I read about how you handle your kiddos behavior. And, I'm really working on being much less 'offendable.' I can see such a huge difference in how each instance goes when I am calm and kind versus frustrated and angry. So now I just check your blog over and over again for more wisdom! :)

Parenting the Hoovers said...

I have a child who stuggled with anxiety, including bathing, sleeping in her room, and going to the bathroom. As a result, she didn't bathe or wipe for more than a year.

I'm not sure what is different now. She's matured. She's 12 with no signs of puberty, but she's doing better. She takes the medication lamictal along with her others.

Her little sister had anxiety that became so bad that she wouldn't even go outside. She began having meltdowns at school. A combination of lamictal, paxil in very small doses, and her other meds, plus some time, and she's a different child.

Hang in there. It's sucks the life out of you to have someone so anxious that you can't even get away from them without them freaking out. It's hard to be needed that badly.

I'll be thinking of you and praying for you.