Monday, January 04, 2010

Breaking the Cycle

One of my girls tried to play a tickling game with a younger sister. The younger one had another step in to stop the game because it is a huge NO-NO here. The child refused to stop "playing" and got rougher. The child that stepped in came running to get me. She just didn't think it was right.

I yelled up the stairs for the older child to help me in the kitchen. She refused. I knew immediately it hadn't been innocent. I skipped stairs to get to her. She was curled up under the desk in her room, crying. I spoke softly and assured her I wasn't mad. She wouldn't speak and I told her what I thought happened. I was sure she had started playing and began to have tingling feelings that got out of control. I explained I wasn't mad or disappointed with her. I was mad at someone else and we could talk about it later.

About 30 minutes later she joined me int he kitchen. She asked who I was mad at. I told her it was her parents. Without them, she could play and not worry about being aroused. It's not her fault. I also told her how great she handled it because other children, including her, have continued that behavior and touched another child inappropriately. I am proud that she thought twice. She should be, too. She will not be like her parents. She has already broken the cycle.


Sheri said...

You rock!

adoptyaroslav said...

That's great that your kids now recognize when things are getting out of hand and can stop each other from continuing a potentially bad behavior. Says huge things about their security with you and your parenting style. My hat is off to you!


J. said...

breaking cycles is so hard - yipee for moving on.