My husband and I went to a second ultrasound today of the baby boy that is due on October 5th. He is 26 weeks along and is 2.1 pounds. Everything is going along beautifully and both Mother and baby seem healthy. We are concerned about her smoking and previous drinking issue but I do not feel it is my place to state the obvious. I believe she has quit drinking but I know she is still smoking. She is gaining a ton of weight and does the glucose test in 2 weeks.
She is using my favorite OB/GYN at my suggestion and I was so proud today when they asked her about her intention to place her child for adoption. The doctor was very nice but asked some important questions about why and reminded her that her emotions were running high. She was supportive of whatever her choice is but offered to help her find services if she chose to keep the baby if it was a financial issue. She told her not to worry about backing out and she needs to really make the decision after the baby is born. My friend got a little angry and told her she sounded like me and she wasn't going to just string us along that this was a very hard decision she has been thinking about all along. She shared that she feels numb about the baby and he doesn't feel like her child. I spoke up and assured the doctor that this is a sticky topic for her and I b/c she feels the decision is made and I think she makes it after the baby is home for a bit. We completely support her in parenting or adoption. The doctor was a bit surprised we weren't just out for her baby and completely agreed with her. My friend thinks everyone is undermining her and they think she unable to make decisions of her own. She was able to think a bit more clearly after we left and realized she was just looking after her patient's best interest.
I have been keeping her daughter 5 days and nights a week for a month so she can work. Her job decided to close it's doors for the week with no warning and she is forced to keep her this week. It is an obvious stresser for her and she constantly is frustrated with the 3 yr old. I will pick her daughter up on Friday and return her on Monday whether she works or not. She needs a break. It is hard for me to relate to but I am trying.