Friday, May 18, 2007

Some Good, Bad, and Expensive

Despite my best efforts the kids really irritated me yesterday afternoon. I think the end of the school year is really getting to them. My son went off for no reason what so ever. I had him smile before it got out of control but he insisted on pushing himself to the point of throwing everything off the many shelves in the playroom, throwing down the play kitchen and jumping on it, hitting 2 kids with his shoes, beating up a baby doll, and screaming for over an hour about how much he hates me. What did I do?

C, A, and P took my son's hair gel (yes, he is the only one that wears hair products in our house) and fixed their doll's hair with it. Then they decided to brush their baby's hair and used B's brush so they did not get theirs dirty. B was not a happy camper.

D dumped a bucket of muddy water on P and C for no apparent reason and melted down for an hour. She threw herself on the floor over and over. What is up with that? This child tries to hurt herself almost every time she gets mad. That is pretty scary, she could really hurt herself or leave marks and blame me for them. She has started to threaten to do just that which is why I made her stay in the living room while she chose to throw herself down.

Gosh, sure doesn't sound very positive does it? Let me think of some nice things to say about my little boogers.
B watched The Color Purple and can't wait to discuss it this afternoon. She is trying to get control over her negative attitude towards me and this is her way of finding things to talk about with me.
P is the first to get ready every morning w/o being reminded. She is becoming such a happy child.
D is doing much better at fixing her hair in the morning and is trying to present herself in a more age appropriate manner. She is becoming more aware of how dirty she makes herself and trying to clean up her act a bit.
A has picked out his clothes all week and has been ready for the bus. He has been giving me hugs and kisses all week.
Emma has not whined about getting up "so early" all week. She ate all her dinner last night w/o a word about it.
C has promised to work on her horrible attitude and seems to recover a little quicker for the last 2 days.
A is such a great helper with my niece. She loves to be the big girl and buckle her seat belt.

I went to court for the kids on Wednesday, it was their annual review. At the last minute I was required be there and had to make arrangements for some of the kids in the morning to catch the bus. I had to take the twins and my niece, they put us in a great little room with toys and a TV. The Judge called me into the courtroom and thanked us for keeping the kids together. He told me that he had hesitated in granting the TPR b/c he knew they would be separated when they were adopted. This is the 3rd generation he has dealt with this family and we were shocked to hear they have 3 registered sex offenders in their family. He tried to encourage us to stay the course with them and even though we were having such hard times it would all be worth it in the end. I promised we would adopt them all and make every effort to maintain some of the healthy birth family relationships. It was very moving for me and I found myself fighting back tears. I love my kids so much, sometimes it really surprises me given they care so little about themselves or others.

Two last thoughts, the Attachment Therapist cancelled at the last minute and C's new $2500 stroller will be delivered next Friday.


Mongoose said...

That's weird about the TPR. I really don't think that being separated would be nearly as damaging to them than the kind of experiences they had with their family.

You're the salt of the earth. :)

ania said...

Oh my goodness!! Three generations? This morning, I was thinking that I should modify the first comment that I left. This reinforces it.

It's not that this world isn't right for them, or however I phrased's that their early life was warped beyond recognition, and that grossly perverse, predatory, abhorrent and abnormal behaviour was presented as "normal".

I'll keep you and your family in my prayers. Your kiddos deserve a chance to be productive citizens, and not to repeat this deeply implanted lifestyle.