Well, we are back to "normal". My son, A, had several mini meltdowns before school yesterday and my 8 yr old refused to do her homework Wed night and again yesterday morning. I handled both beautifully and put it back on them. I explained to my son I did not care what he was wearing for school, he would be attending anyway. He is so sute and warned me he would be in his pull up. I smiled and explained I did not mind if he needed to wear it to school, he would go as is whatever that was. He quickly changed his clothes but then started throwing his toothbrush and toothpaste. "I wouldn't want to use a toothbrush that had been on the floor next to the toilet in case someone had missed it using it but if you think that is ok then have at it." I walked away but listened. It took him a few minutes but he started trying to clean his toothbrush and eventually brushed his teeth. He struggled with shoes and on and on but he got to the bus stop in time and got on. Yeah!!
My 8 yr old, P, can not read or recognise most letters so while we wait for the school to catch up to her IEP and put her in the correct classes she is given regular homework. She gets really frustrated and refuses to try with my assistance. Now I believe whole hearted that she is as smart as any child in her class she just down plays it and has not learned any of the things she should have b/c she is too busy acting out. She refused to do her homework and I gave her a couple of tries and then told her she must be too tired to learn and good night. She was angry but complied for fear she would have chores for acting up about bed time. Mom is not flexible on that and she has learned the hard way. I got her up really early and we tried again. Took her a couple of tries and I explained I was too busy in the AM and had no problem sending a note to her teacher and letting her take a big fat zero so she had one more minute of my precious time. I left and came back and she was ready.
D has been doing so much better about not rubbing her privates on me and I can feel myself feeling better about her. SHe told me the truth 2 times yesterday and I was so proud of her. Both time it was something she would have gotten in trouble for. I hugged her many times yesterday and she is loving the attention.
My eldest, B, is driving me nuts. She is so nice to my face but I feel the negative vibes she shoots at me. She thinks I am stupid and corrects me constantly. She had a dx of RAD that we all thought was not true b/c we can't find it anywhere on paper. Oh she has it all right!!! It's just not in your face defiant like the others. I looked at some paperwork that Attachment Therapist gave me awhile back and what does it describe? My child!!! It said everything I was feeling, I was so happy to see it in writing. It really upsets me that she probably has it but at least I know what need to be done and it isn't just a personality conflict. I will be so much more tolerant of her now while I nail her behaviors to the wall. I began last night and am making all of her decisions for her. That did not go over well at all. She was nice to me but let the kids have it for nothing MANY times. She is not going to like it here but I will do whatever it takes to help her heal.