My son is beginning to use me to regulate himself again. This is NOT my job. I try very hard to find ways to help him actually use the coping skills he can spout out at me. It isn't working. He is too angry then and I am always his focus when he gets angry. We are going to try scheduling tantrums every day for just a minute or so. He can scream and stomp about anything he wants to but I will try to help him focus on his past hurts. This way he can get some of it out instead of looking for reasons to blame me for something and attack me or sabatoge himself.
He went nuts yesterday after his teacher allowed him to print out a picture of Chucky and bring it home. If you just consider his age, it is inappropriate but if you consider him, it's absolutely ridiculous. He was testing them and they failed. He came home and screamed and yelled at me about anything and every thing. Eventually, I pulled out the video camera. He used to fall to the floor limp at the very sight of a camera. Not anymore. He ran like a crazy person around the table throwing everything on the floor. I had to stop when he ran at me and began hitting me with both fists over and over and over. It gave the therapist a good idea of how little control we have to help calm him. All we can do in manage him.